Do you want to fall in love and stay in love forever? Do you want a relationship that endures through good times and hard times? Singles can often get discouraged. “Will I be alone the rest of my life?” is a frequent question. You don’t have to be alone if you don’t want to be. HOWEVER-- you may have to quiet the discouraging voices of yourself and others, and keep remembering that you deserve a great love.
Recently, at a conference on relationships, one of the wedding planners summed up her observations: “The brides we work with span a range of all ages and are so terrified they are going to wind up alone, they have suddenly and indiscriminately chosen someone to marry. They then get totally absorbed in the planning of the wedding. This activity is a distraction from the larger issue of what they are going to do with the rest of their life—AFTER the wedding!”
To fall in love for the rest of your life, you must quiet the inner voice of fear. Have you made some decisions based on fear that you now regret? Many people panic and choose someone who they silently know is not right for them. They have listened to the negative voices, which have guided their choices. Here are some phrases that singles often hear:
“No one is perfect.”
To fall in love and stay in love is to know that there is someone who is perfect just for you. When you love someone for good and solid reasons, your bond can be deep enough to work through issues and challenges. When you choose well to begin with, you are committed to each other and the life you are making together.
“I’m not getting any younger.”
You’re right --and neither is anyone else. You can still have a relationship. More people get divorced or wait longer to get married than at any other time in history. Consequently, there are more singles in every age group for you to choose from, and more people looking for a relationship of substance as they get older.
“There is no such thing as a perfect relationship.”
This is the excuse we make when we have lost the courage and heart to keep looking for someone wonderful. Because relationships have not worked out for us in the past, we look for the flaws in other peoples’ marriages and point to those as the reason we don’t want a partner. It helps to be reminded that there are people who are together who not only survive—they thrive. If you would like to find a mate, remember that the search is scary, but courage is not an absence of fear. Courage is taking the actions you need in order to get what you want, and persevering until you get it.
“All marriages have problems.”
Of course they do! That doesn't mean you can't still love the person you have chosen. And when you examine what is going on between two people, you will discover that we need our relationship problems to help us grow. Working them out brings us our life’s lessons. So choose a life partner who is worth the stretch you will inevitably make.
“Everyone has flaws.”
To have the courage to fall in love, you need a positive context for human flaws. Our flaws define us, give us the challenges we have to work through, and ultimately, show us our strengths.
“It’s too late to meet someone.”
It’s never too late to fall in love—unless you say so. Consider the following:
* Network Tell your family and friends you want to meet someone.
* Internet Write a good profile; send a flattering picture; use caution.
* Go out —and be friendly when you get there.
If you don’t want to be alone, but you also don’t want to compromise to have a relationship, listen carefully for the voices that make some of the above remarks. They may seem like harmless words, but those phrases become your self-limiting thoughts. Those are the thoughts that keep you from being able to fall in love for the rest of your life.
Visit http://www.tonjaweimer.com or http://www.singlesdatingtips.com for more tips, skills, and insight on dating, relationships, singles, and love. Subscribe to our F*ree Savvy Dating Newsletter from master single's coach, life coach, and syndicated columnist, Tonja Weimer. Copyright 2006, Tonja Weimer. (Please note source if reprinting this article.)
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Saturday, March 24, 2007
The Most Important Thing to Look for in a Relationship
Good looking, intelligent, personable, self-assured, these are important, but if the most important thing is missing, the relationship could be doomed. Usually we are attracted by physical attributes, the most obvious being gender, but build, height, hair color – all of these count too. Then we subconsciously look for things that compliment our deficiencies, and that might carry over in a positive way to any offspring that might result. It’s a biological and psychological process.
If all of this fits, then emotion takes over in the form of strong desire, and if the relationship proceeds on track, the desire becomes merely an attachment and a clinging if the most important attribute, the one we haven’t discussed yet, doesn’t come into play.
Think about when the desire begins to fade, as it will, and when the attachment and clinging becomes no more than a security thing; then what? This is the point when a relationship will either survive or fail, depending on the psychological needs of each partner and how strongly they require sensual stimulations. Approximately 50 % of marriages fail, and the number of failed relationships, although unknown, eclipses that figure for sure.
So the question is; what lengths would you be prepared to go to, to insure the survival of your relationship? If I could tell you what was the most important thing in a relationship, and that this most important thing would almost certainly insure your relationship’s survival, and . . . if it didn’t cost any money (and very little time), would you consider it?
This most important thing creates harmony in any relationship between human beings. Without it, we sink to our survival instincts of selfish greed, hatred, and confusion about life. This most important thing has nothing to do with religious beliefs or ideals; it is a very human element. We could call it love, however love has many faces, and the love we speak of here is not a love where we might love one but hate another, because that “other” could easily become you someday. If the capacity for hatred remains inside of us, it’s only a matter of time before that hatred is turned on those we supposedly love – the hatred is too painful to hold inside and must be released, usually on the ones nearest and dearest. This is because the “love” we thought we had for each other had been no more than lust and attachment, not authentic love at all.
Authentic love means that we love everybody. And it’s not a gushy love; it’s more mature than that. It’s respect, compassion, wisdom – all rolled up into one - and that one thing that is the most important in a relationship is . . . "Unconditional Love." The person who has developed unconditional love will love you from a deeper level than merely lust or attachment. This person will love you for the same reason that he or she loves humanity, because they do not set themselves apart from humanity; they are an integral part of it.
So look for unconditional love in a person; it’s easy to spot. And when you spot it, make certain that you can respond in kind. This special love, however, is either in your heart or not, and if it isn’t, first acknowledge that it is not there, and then do something about it.
To do something about it, begin with sitting quietly every evening for a few minutes and watch the many thoughts that flit through your mind. The fearful thoughts are the ones that keep you from unconditional love, and all you have to do is acknowledge them as you sit quietly and wait for the next thought to appear. Picture yourself on a freeway overpass, and the cars and trucks passing below your thoughts. Don’t jump into one and go for a ride, just watch them pass below and out of sight without becoming involved. This is how unconditional love is born, because our thoughts are our “selves,” and as we slowly distance ourselves from our negative thoughts, we slowly distance ourselves from our negative “selves,” and when we do that, the hatred we once had for those we don’t agree with softens, and we become unconditionally loving.
This is the way to the strongest relationship possible – it’s the most important thing.
E. Raymond Rock of Fort Myers, Florida is cofounder and principal teacher at the Southwest Florida Insight Center, http://www.SouthwestFloridaInsightCenter.com His twenty-eight years of meditation experience has taken him across four continents, including two stopovers in Thailand where he practiced in the remote northeast forests as an ordained Theravada Buddhist monk. His book, A Year to Enlightenment (Career Press/New Page Books) is now available at major bookstores and online retailers. Visit http://www.AYearToEnlightenment.com
If all of this fits, then emotion takes over in the form of strong desire, and if the relationship proceeds on track, the desire becomes merely an attachment and a clinging if the most important attribute, the one we haven’t discussed yet, doesn’t come into play.
Think about when the desire begins to fade, as it will, and when the attachment and clinging becomes no more than a security thing; then what? This is the point when a relationship will either survive or fail, depending on the psychological needs of each partner and how strongly they require sensual stimulations. Approximately 50 % of marriages fail, and the number of failed relationships, although unknown, eclipses that figure for sure.
So the question is; what lengths would you be prepared to go to, to insure the survival of your relationship? If I could tell you what was the most important thing in a relationship, and that this most important thing would almost certainly insure your relationship’s survival, and . . . if it didn’t cost any money (and very little time), would you consider it?
This most important thing creates harmony in any relationship between human beings. Without it, we sink to our survival instincts of selfish greed, hatred, and confusion about life. This most important thing has nothing to do with religious beliefs or ideals; it is a very human element. We could call it love, however love has many faces, and the love we speak of here is not a love where we might love one but hate another, because that “other” could easily become you someday. If the capacity for hatred remains inside of us, it’s only a matter of time before that hatred is turned on those we supposedly love – the hatred is too painful to hold inside and must be released, usually on the ones nearest and dearest. This is because the “love” we thought we had for each other had been no more than lust and attachment, not authentic love at all.
Authentic love means that we love everybody. And it’s not a gushy love; it’s more mature than that. It’s respect, compassion, wisdom – all rolled up into one - and that one thing that is the most important in a relationship is . . . "Unconditional Love." The person who has developed unconditional love will love you from a deeper level than merely lust or attachment. This person will love you for the same reason that he or she loves humanity, because they do not set themselves apart from humanity; they are an integral part of it.
So look for unconditional love in a person; it’s easy to spot. And when you spot it, make certain that you can respond in kind. This special love, however, is either in your heart or not, and if it isn’t, first acknowledge that it is not there, and then do something about it.
To do something about it, begin with sitting quietly every evening for a few minutes and watch the many thoughts that flit through your mind. The fearful thoughts are the ones that keep you from unconditional love, and all you have to do is acknowledge them as you sit quietly and wait for the next thought to appear. Picture yourself on a freeway overpass, and the cars and trucks passing below your thoughts. Don’t jump into one and go for a ride, just watch them pass below and out of sight without becoming involved. This is how unconditional love is born, because our thoughts are our “selves,” and as we slowly distance ourselves from our negative thoughts, we slowly distance ourselves from our negative “selves,” and when we do that, the hatred we once had for those we don’t agree with softens, and we become unconditionally loving.
This is the way to the strongest relationship possible – it’s the most important thing.
E. Raymond Rock of Fort Myers, Florida is cofounder and principal teacher at the Southwest Florida Insight Center, http://www.SouthwestFloridaInsightCenter.com His twenty-eight years of meditation experience has taken him across four continents, including two stopovers in Thailand where he practiced in the remote northeast forests as an ordained Theravada Buddhist monk. His book, A Year to Enlightenment (Career Press/New Page Books) is now available at major bookstores and online retailers. Visit http://www.AYearToEnlightenment.com
Sunday, March 18, 2007
When Silence Is The Best Answer You Can Give A Woman
When Silence Is The Best Answer You Can Give A Woman
By Teddy Shabba
Any time you find yourself faced with a question from a woman you are in a relationship with in which whatever you answer will require you to explain yourself you have 3 options:
State your answer and offer no explanationIgnore the questionStay silent for a moment as if you are thinking of an answer and then move on to something else.As you already probably noticed explaining yourself is not an option. The reason for this is because an explanation assumes she is looking for a logical answer when in reality she is looking for an emotional one.
As long as you continue to talk and try to explain your answer you prevent the one person capable of coming up with an emotional answer good enough for her, which is her.
If you have an answer that you would like it to be give it to her and allow her to come up with the reason why it should be that.
Even if her reason for doing what you want is completely different or illogical it doesn't matter because you still have gotten what you want.
More often than not, however, her questions will fall into the there is no good, right, or the answer is already known.
It is these questions that must be ignored and moved past.
Mainly because an answer doesn't benefit you and she knows it.
Ignoring the question just lets her know that you know there is no right answer and that you are wise enough to know better.
Teddy Shabba is a Dating Coach for Men who has a daily newsletter that provides you with a wealth of information on how to be more successful with women. You can sign up for the Teddy Shabba Dating Advice Newsletter for Men now.
Also with over 500 articles from a variety of dating experts just for men our Dating Advice and Seduction Article Database is the perfect place for any man.
To learn more about How To Attract Women visit our article section Attract Women Today
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Teddy_Shabba
http://EzineArticles.com/?When-Silence-Is-The-Best-Answer-You-Can-Give-A-Woman&id=493233
By Teddy Shabba
Any time you find yourself faced with a question from a woman you are in a relationship with in which whatever you answer will require you to explain yourself you have 3 options:
State your answer and offer no explanationIgnore the questionStay silent for a moment as if you are thinking of an answer and then move on to something else.As you already probably noticed explaining yourself is not an option. The reason for this is because an explanation assumes she is looking for a logical answer when in reality she is looking for an emotional one.
As long as you continue to talk and try to explain your answer you prevent the one person capable of coming up with an emotional answer good enough for her, which is her.
If you have an answer that you would like it to be give it to her and allow her to come up with the reason why it should be that.
Even if her reason for doing what you want is completely different or illogical it doesn't matter because you still have gotten what you want.
More often than not, however, her questions will fall into the there is no good, right, or the answer is already known.
It is these questions that must be ignored and moved past.
Mainly because an answer doesn't benefit you and she knows it.
Ignoring the question just lets her know that you know there is no right answer and that you are wise enough to know better.
Teddy Shabba is a Dating Coach for Men who has a daily newsletter that provides you with a wealth of information on how to be more successful with women. You can sign up for the Teddy Shabba Dating Advice Newsletter for Men now.
Also with over 500 articles from a variety of dating experts just for men our Dating Advice and Seduction Article Database is the perfect place for any man.
To learn more about How To Attract Women visit our article section Attract Women Today
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Teddy_Shabba
http://EzineArticles.com/?When-Silence-Is-The-Best-Answer-You-Can-Give-A-Woman&id=493233
Friday, March 16, 2007
Dealing with Conflicting Personalities
You love them, but your personalities just don't mesh. You frequently argue or get frustrated with each other. Sometimes it's a one-sided feeling of frustration while other times it's mutual.
Your New Mantra: "I can't change other people. I can only control myself."
One of the most difficult things to do when we believe that we are right and others are wrong is to accept that you can't change their minds. Likewise, you can't change their habits, their lifestyle, their addictions, etc. It doesn't matter if you are trying to help them improve their lives, persuade them to take on your political or social views for the good of humanity, teach them about basic concepts, etc. It's easy to let go of conflicts that only happen once in awhile, but what do you do when every day is a struggle, when every conversation is a conflict? What do you do when you dread seeing or talking to this person because you know it's going to end in an argument or belittlement or worse?
The 3 Steps of Dealing with Difficult Persons Gracefully: Understanding, Compassion, and Response
I truly believe that understanding is the root of all happiness. In understanding a person's actions or beliefs, we realize that their actions and beliefs have absolutely nothing to do with us. Once we understand why people do what they do, we are able to have compassion for them.
It is important to note that having compassion for somebody does not mean that you are in any way obligated to fix their problem. Your needs are always the priority in these situations because you can't change other people, you can only control yourself. (Remember your mantra.) You can't meet their needs for them. They must learn to meet their needs themselves. Likewise, you must meet your own needs yourself, and if you spent all of your time and energy trying to fix somebody else's problems, you would never have time and energy to meet your own needs.
Finally there is the response. How do you respond to "difficult" people? It often depends on the situation.
* Situation: Your family is giving you a hard time about a choice that you have made for your life (job, money, partner, etc.), and they're criticizing you.
Understanding: "They are trying to help me. They just aren't doing it in a very effective way."
Compassion: "It's too bad they don't see that I'm happy with the choices that I've made."
Response: "Well, thank you for being concerned about me." No further explanation is necessary.
* Situation: A friend of yours is very demanding and always seems to want your attention, causing you to feel simply drained after every encounter.
Understanding: "She has self-esteem issues and feels like she needs to have attention to feel important. She thinks that I'm important, so my attention is important to her."
Compassion: "It's too bad she doesn't realize that she is important even when nobody is paying attention to her."
Response: "Oh, I have some important things I have to do, so we'll need to get together some other time." There is no need to explain what you need to do.
* Situation: Somebody insults you. (It doesn't matter what the insult is.)
Understanding: "They are simply projecting their own beliefs about the world on me."
Compassion: "It's too bad they have such a limited view of the world. There are so many wonderful things that they could bring into their lives if they just opened their hearts and minds to all of the good things that are a part of diversity."
Response: "OK" or "Interesting" or "I disagree." There is no need to respond to insults any further than that. They don't any further response. Someone who is insulting wouldn't listen to your response anyhow and would just prefer to argue. Simply acknowledgs that you heard what the other person was saying. Then remove yourself from the situation (end the conversation, hang up the phone, leave the room, etc.).
Making More Space and Getting Your Distance
Sometimes, the only way to deal with the situation is to avoid it in the first place by avoiding contact with the difficult person.
You can easily create some distance (most of the time) by having "other obligations" much of the time. You don't have to say "I don't want to see you or talk to you as much." You just need to let them know that you do have other things to do, responsibilities, obligations, etc., and you need to spend more time focusing on those things.
If you live with this difficult person, you may want to consider moving out. If moving out is not an option, you may need to find activities away from the person. Joining a class, volunteering somewhere, etc. will get you out of the house. Even working in the yard every day can help (assuming that the person doesn't say, "Great! I'll go with you" because then you'll have to come up with plan B).
Getting Professional Counseling
In some situations, you may need to work with a professional counselor to figure out how to heal the relationship. Couples counseling, group counseling, family counseling, etc. are perfect for getting everyone together to talk about problems in a constructive way.
(If you believe this difficult person has a mental illness or some other mental problem that requires professional help, you can send a letter to his/her doctor and find out what mental health resources are available in your area to address the problem, but you cannot force an adult into treatment if he/she is not a danger to himself or others and is considered mentally competent.)
If the difficult person refuses to go to counseling with you, or if the person is a customer, co-worker, neighbor, etc. (let's face it, we don't ask our customers to come to counseling with us), don't rule out counseling as an option. You can still make great strides by attending counseling by yourself.
Ending the Relationship
Typically, you'll want to make an effort to find out if an official breakup is absolutely necessary, especially if this difficult person is a family member. In my experience, and in talking to others, I have learned that a one-on-one conversation is often the best way to determine if the relationship can heal and continue or must come to an end. A professional counseling can also help you make the decision. If a relationship clearly can't continue in a healthy way, then a breakup may be necessary.
(There is one exception to the breakup option: if the difficult person is a child under your care or a child related to you, you do have an obligation to continue the relationship, to continue to reach out to that child. Ending a relationship with a child is equivalent to giving-up on that child. No one should ever give up on a child. Seek professional counseling instead.)
Don't Feel Guilty
The most important thing to remind yourself is that it's all right to avoid the difficult person. It's all right to end the relationship. You shouldn't have to force yourself to deal with a person who brings unnecessary stress and unhappiness to your life.
Likewise, don't feel guilty about not being able to fix the situation. Remember, you can't fix other people. The best you can do is give them an inspiring self-help book and the name of a good counselor. Then leave it to them to take the necessary steps to help themselves.
Meanwhile, you should focus on helping yourself regain balance, well-being, and happiness.
To read more about this topic, visit Kristen's Guide.
Kristen's Guide: kristensguide.com is a website dedicated to helping persons like you have happier, balanced lives by providing hundreds of free useful tips and tools, including free printables and calculators, that can make life easier.
Your New Mantra: "I can't change other people. I can only control myself."
One of the most difficult things to do when we believe that we are right and others are wrong is to accept that you can't change their minds. Likewise, you can't change their habits, their lifestyle, their addictions, etc. It doesn't matter if you are trying to help them improve their lives, persuade them to take on your political or social views for the good of humanity, teach them about basic concepts, etc. It's easy to let go of conflicts that only happen once in awhile, but what do you do when every day is a struggle, when every conversation is a conflict? What do you do when you dread seeing or talking to this person because you know it's going to end in an argument or belittlement or worse?
The 3 Steps of Dealing with Difficult Persons Gracefully: Understanding, Compassion, and Response
I truly believe that understanding is the root of all happiness. In understanding a person's actions or beliefs, we realize that their actions and beliefs have absolutely nothing to do with us. Once we understand why people do what they do, we are able to have compassion for them.
It is important to note that having compassion for somebody does not mean that you are in any way obligated to fix their problem. Your needs are always the priority in these situations because you can't change other people, you can only control yourself. (Remember your mantra.) You can't meet their needs for them. They must learn to meet their needs themselves. Likewise, you must meet your own needs yourself, and if you spent all of your time and energy trying to fix somebody else's problems, you would never have time and energy to meet your own needs.
Finally there is the response. How do you respond to "difficult" people? It often depends on the situation.
* Situation: Your family is giving you a hard time about a choice that you have made for your life (job, money, partner, etc.), and they're criticizing you.
Understanding: "They are trying to help me. They just aren't doing it in a very effective way."
Compassion: "It's too bad they don't see that I'm happy with the choices that I've made."
Response: "Well, thank you for being concerned about me." No further explanation is necessary.
* Situation: A friend of yours is very demanding and always seems to want your attention, causing you to feel simply drained after every encounter.
Understanding: "She has self-esteem issues and feels like she needs to have attention to feel important. She thinks that I'm important, so my attention is important to her."
Compassion: "It's too bad she doesn't realize that she is important even when nobody is paying attention to her."
Response: "Oh, I have some important things I have to do, so we'll need to get together some other time." There is no need to explain what you need to do.
* Situation: Somebody insults you. (It doesn't matter what the insult is.)
Understanding: "They are simply projecting their own beliefs about the world on me."
Compassion: "It's too bad they have such a limited view of the world. There are so many wonderful things that they could bring into their lives if they just opened their hearts and minds to all of the good things that are a part of diversity."
Response: "OK" or "Interesting" or "I disagree." There is no need to respond to insults any further than that. They don't any further response. Someone who is insulting wouldn't listen to your response anyhow and would just prefer to argue. Simply acknowledgs that you heard what the other person was saying. Then remove yourself from the situation (end the conversation, hang up the phone, leave the room, etc.).
Making More Space and Getting Your Distance
Sometimes, the only way to deal with the situation is to avoid it in the first place by avoiding contact with the difficult person.
You can easily create some distance (most of the time) by having "other obligations" much of the time. You don't have to say "I don't want to see you or talk to you as much." You just need to let them know that you do have other things to do, responsibilities, obligations, etc., and you need to spend more time focusing on those things.
If you live with this difficult person, you may want to consider moving out. If moving out is not an option, you may need to find activities away from the person. Joining a class, volunteering somewhere, etc. will get you out of the house. Even working in the yard every day can help (assuming that the person doesn't say, "Great! I'll go with you" because then you'll have to come up with plan B).
Getting Professional Counseling
In some situations, you may need to work with a professional counselor to figure out how to heal the relationship. Couples counseling, group counseling, family counseling, etc. are perfect for getting everyone together to talk about problems in a constructive way.
(If you believe this difficult person has a mental illness or some other mental problem that requires professional help, you can send a letter to his/her doctor and find out what mental health resources are available in your area to address the problem, but you cannot force an adult into treatment if he/she is not a danger to himself or others and is considered mentally competent.)
If the difficult person refuses to go to counseling with you, or if the person is a customer, co-worker, neighbor, etc. (let's face it, we don't ask our customers to come to counseling with us), don't rule out counseling as an option. You can still make great strides by attending counseling by yourself.
Ending the Relationship
Typically, you'll want to make an effort to find out if an official breakup is absolutely necessary, especially if this difficult person is a family member. In my experience, and in talking to others, I have learned that a one-on-one conversation is often the best way to determine if the relationship can heal and continue or must come to an end. A professional counseling can also help you make the decision. If a relationship clearly can't continue in a healthy way, then a breakup may be necessary.
(There is one exception to the breakup option: if the difficult person is a child under your care or a child related to you, you do have an obligation to continue the relationship, to continue to reach out to that child. Ending a relationship with a child is equivalent to giving-up on that child. No one should ever give up on a child. Seek professional counseling instead.)
Don't Feel Guilty
The most important thing to remind yourself is that it's all right to avoid the difficult person. It's all right to end the relationship. You shouldn't have to force yourself to deal with a person who brings unnecessary stress and unhappiness to your life.
Likewise, don't feel guilty about not being able to fix the situation. Remember, you can't fix other people. The best you can do is give them an inspiring self-help book and the name of a good counselor. Then leave it to them to take the necessary steps to help themselves.
Meanwhile, you should focus on helping yourself regain balance, well-being, and happiness.
To read more about this topic, visit Kristen's Guide.
Kristen's Guide: kristensguide.com is a website dedicated to helping persons like you have happier, balanced lives by providing hundreds of free useful tips and tools, including free printables and calculators, that can make life easier.
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Reasons Why Young Women Love Older Men
What attracts a young woman to an older man? What is she seeking? Love, Understanding, Support, Financial Security, a Father figure, the Unknown or Marriage? There are many reasons why young women love older men.
Ask yourself what does every woman want? A woman wants to have a stable life, a man with a good stable job that can provide a home, a stable future, children, great sex, a best friend, at least one vacation a year and a little bit of adventure would not hurt. She wants to feel like a princess even if her only kingdom is a rented apartment, she wants to reign with a smile on her face and a great love in her heart. She wants to be treated with kindness, respected and never taken for granted. A woman wants to feel special, cherished and loved.
Young women love older men and prefer them for many reasons. Older men have already played the field, know what they want, have been around longer, have more life experiences, are more worldly and well traveled. They not only hear but listen to what the younger woman has to say, they ask questions and are interested in what she is saying. These older men know how women count on their support and they are more than happy to give their woman what she needs. They come to her full of wonderful tales of travels, good and bad life experiences, wisdom and knowledge of which in many cases she has only slightly tasted. The older man is many times much more sophisticated, cultured and chivalrous than the average young guy. They enjoy long, deep conversations about topics that interest her, always striving to nurture the mental connection between them, they enjoy pleasing their woman. Often times, he has acquired faith in God or at least the belief that there is a higher power and has embraced spirituality. The younger woman may or may not be spiritual but if she is this connection will only strengthen the bond between them. Financial security, sexual experience, masculinity, chivalry, confidence, communication skills and mystery are things that some men take decades to cultivate. In the meantime, these young women spend a huge part of their life with men their own age who will never give them what an older man can.
In an older man she seeks everything she has not been able to find in a man her own age. The older man comes to her ready willing and able to offer her a fulfilling life which is one of the biggest reasons why young women love older men. He takes her to a world she does not know and she is enthralled.
That is the magnet! He satisfies her on every level.
A major difference between marrying an older man and marrying a man her own age is that most of the time once an older man marries that younger woman, he will continue to wine and dine her, he will continue to make her feel like a princess, like a woman, like his pride and joy. The younger man on the other hand after marrying often times stops wining and dining and stops romancing his woman. He gets lazy and stops doing the little things that he use to do before they were married.
So when a younger woman marries an older man it is because in him she has found everything that was always missing from her past relationships. She finds fulfillment on all the levels that count for her, she has come full circle, her search is over, she has found Mr. Right.
As a woman who is married to a fascinating older man, my experience comes from being with a man who satisfies me on every level. So Visit http://www.youngwomenformaturemen.com a free dating service where you can meet that vivacious young woman or that sophisticated older man you’ve always wanted.
Article By: Marisol Colon Copyright 2007 Marstefi Limited
Ask yourself what does every woman want? A woman wants to have a stable life, a man with a good stable job that can provide a home, a stable future, children, great sex, a best friend, at least one vacation a year and a little bit of adventure would not hurt. She wants to feel like a princess even if her only kingdom is a rented apartment, she wants to reign with a smile on her face and a great love in her heart. She wants to be treated with kindness, respected and never taken for granted. A woman wants to feel special, cherished and loved.
Young women love older men and prefer them for many reasons. Older men have already played the field, know what they want, have been around longer, have more life experiences, are more worldly and well traveled. They not only hear but listen to what the younger woman has to say, they ask questions and are interested in what she is saying. These older men know how women count on their support and they are more than happy to give their woman what she needs. They come to her full of wonderful tales of travels, good and bad life experiences, wisdom and knowledge of which in many cases she has only slightly tasted. The older man is many times much more sophisticated, cultured and chivalrous than the average young guy. They enjoy long, deep conversations about topics that interest her, always striving to nurture the mental connection between them, they enjoy pleasing their woman. Often times, he has acquired faith in God or at least the belief that there is a higher power and has embraced spirituality. The younger woman may or may not be spiritual but if she is this connection will only strengthen the bond between them. Financial security, sexual experience, masculinity, chivalry, confidence, communication skills and mystery are things that some men take decades to cultivate. In the meantime, these young women spend a huge part of their life with men their own age who will never give them what an older man can.
In an older man she seeks everything she has not been able to find in a man her own age. The older man comes to her ready willing and able to offer her a fulfilling life which is one of the biggest reasons why young women love older men. He takes her to a world she does not know and she is enthralled.
That is the magnet! He satisfies her on every level.
A major difference between marrying an older man and marrying a man her own age is that most of the time once an older man marries that younger woman, he will continue to wine and dine her, he will continue to make her feel like a princess, like a woman, like his pride and joy. The younger man on the other hand after marrying often times stops wining and dining and stops romancing his woman. He gets lazy and stops doing the little things that he use to do before they were married.
So when a younger woman marries an older man it is because in him she has found everything that was always missing from her past relationships. She finds fulfillment on all the levels that count for her, she has come full circle, her search is over, she has found Mr. Right.
As a woman who is married to a fascinating older man, my experience comes from being with a man who satisfies me on every level. So Visit http://www.youngwomenformaturemen.com a free dating service where you can meet that vivacious young woman or that sophisticated older man you’ve always wanted.
Article By: Marisol Colon Copyright 2007 Marstefi Limited
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
How To Deal With A Painful Breakup
"Are we over?"
You were probably asking yourself this question many times over before the verdict is out.
It is finally time.
You or he/she finally said it. "Let's break".
Ending a relationship is mostly painful, even if you are the initiator. There are a myriad of emotions that come with a break up, and to pick up the pieces and move on with your life needs a certain amount of time and yes, healing is necessary.
Some breakups came as a shock, while some couples saw it coming way before it materialised. Depending on how the break up was handled, dealing with the aftermath could be an easy or uphill task.
This article is to share some useful insights for couples who didn't quite handle the break up that well and either one or both parties could be left with a fair amount of hurt and anger that need to be dealt with.
7 Ways To Deal With Painful Break Ups
1. Handle your emotions
An angry person is an irrational person. Your emotions is probably the main culprit that is preventing you from letting go of the past and your ex.
Allow yourself to feel the whole spectrum of emotions you need and to grieve over this loss, especially if it came a bit unexpectedly or due to a sudden unpleasant event.
Some of you may have a very heavy heart due to the guilt. Maybe you knew you were the one to blame, or maybe you did something wrong that hurt your ex a great deal.
Whatever it is, if you need to feel guilty, then feel it. For a limited period. Go cold turkey if need be during this permissible time.
2. Cry
There's a saying that goes "There's no use crying over spilt milk"
But we all know that crying is a good way to release stress and any pent up negative energy. Crying puts you in a sounder slumber too as your eyes get tired out.
So, we should modify that statement to suit this context.
"There's no use crying over spilt milk too much"
That's right. Do it in moderation. Shedding too much tears is harmful to your eyes. Hey, you still need the windows to your soul to see this beautiful world!
The Essentials of Beginners Yoga
Articles full of Useful tips and information about beginners yoga
3. Acknowledge, Accept and Commit
What's over is over. Tell yourself that this is the fact. If self-talk doesn't help, maybe a bucketful of cold harsh water can do the trick.Hoping for miracles to happen won't work. Hope can only be hopeful when you do something positive.
Make a commitment to yourself. Being committed is different from saying you want to let go and be happy. Being committed means no matter what the circumstance is, regardless if you are in the mood or not, whether you feel you are ready or not, you are committed to be happy.
It's like a promise, only better.
4. Set a goal
Or set a few goals that you want to do now that you are single again. Was there anything you feel like doing but your ex wasn't the least bit keen to accompany you? Do that now. Learn to enjoy the air once more.
Draft out a plan to achieve those goals. Then take action. You won't see huge results right from the beginning, but so long as you consistently move, you will not be marching stationery for long. That is what you want. Progress. In any part of your life.
With a goal chart in place, it makes it easier for you to channel your energy to those areas you want to see changed or improved, and keeps you on track.
5. Build a support network
Tell a few of your friends about the goals you have set and ask for their support. Friendship at this juncture can work miracles. Family's comfort is a big source of encouragement and relief too. That's why people say "there's no place like home" and I agree totally!
6. Help someone
I'm not kidding. Go your way out to help a friend, or simply make it a point to brighten up someone's day. If you find this idea crazy as it sounds now, and impossible, then all the more you should do it and see how you feel after that.
When you take the focus away from yourself and concentrate on giving to make a positive difference in another person's life, it can be one of the best rewards you can for yourself during a time when you feel you need love and attention yet you are giving it away.
You not only feel better about yourself, you also made another person feel better too. What can be any better than this?
This is by far my favourite among this entire list.
7. Nail down the "Whats" and the "Hows"
What can you do to feel better? How can you achieve that? What is good about yourself? How can you love yourself again?
When you start asking yourself the "What" and "How" you will notice many alternatives mushrooming. Once you have exposed yourself to the gamut of possibilities, you will begin to feel better even before you act on your preferred choice.
The end of a relationship only means you are open to the possibility of another one, which can only be better since you now have more experiences. I hope you had, because if you haven't learn those lessons, you will continue to encounter similar episodes in your life until you finally take those lessons, not only pain, away with you and make yourself richer.
Finally, if you allow your feelings (usually negative ones) to subjugate you, you will always be living in the shadows of your past. Do you really like to stay there forever?
Kloudiia Tay IINg, a Love Coach and Author of the book The 69 Love Notes - Secrets To A Loving And Lasting Relationship" writes about Love and Marriage, Dating Relationships for all singles looking for love and couples wanting to create loving and lasting relationships.
For more articles, please visit http://www.Kloudiia.com now.
You were probably asking yourself this question many times over before the verdict is out.
It is finally time.
You or he/she finally said it. "Let's break".
Ending a relationship is mostly painful, even if you are the initiator. There are a myriad of emotions that come with a break up, and to pick up the pieces and move on with your life needs a certain amount of time and yes, healing is necessary.
Some breakups came as a shock, while some couples saw it coming way before it materialised. Depending on how the break up was handled, dealing with the aftermath could be an easy or uphill task.
This article is to share some useful insights for couples who didn't quite handle the break up that well and either one or both parties could be left with a fair amount of hurt and anger that need to be dealt with.
7 Ways To Deal With Painful Break Ups
1. Handle your emotions
An angry person is an irrational person. Your emotions is probably the main culprit that is preventing you from letting go of the past and your ex.
Allow yourself to feel the whole spectrum of emotions you need and to grieve over this loss, especially if it came a bit unexpectedly or due to a sudden unpleasant event.
Some of you may have a very heavy heart due to the guilt. Maybe you knew you were the one to blame, or maybe you did something wrong that hurt your ex a great deal.
Whatever it is, if you need to feel guilty, then feel it. For a limited period. Go cold turkey if need be during this permissible time.
2. Cry
There's a saying that goes "There's no use crying over spilt milk"
But we all know that crying is a good way to release stress and any pent up negative energy. Crying puts you in a sounder slumber too as your eyes get tired out.
So, we should modify that statement to suit this context.
"There's no use crying over spilt milk too much"
That's right. Do it in moderation. Shedding too much tears is harmful to your eyes. Hey, you still need the windows to your soul to see this beautiful world!
The Essentials of Beginners Yoga
Articles full of Useful tips and information about beginners yoga
3. Acknowledge, Accept and Commit
What's over is over. Tell yourself that this is the fact. If self-talk doesn't help, maybe a bucketful of cold harsh water can do the trick.Hoping for miracles to happen won't work. Hope can only be hopeful when you do something positive.
Make a commitment to yourself. Being committed is different from saying you want to let go and be happy. Being committed means no matter what the circumstance is, regardless if you are in the mood or not, whether you feel you are ready or not, you are committed to be happy.
It's like a promise, only better.
4. Set a goal
Or set a few goals that you want to do now that you are single again. Was there anything you feel like doing but your ex wasn't the least bit keen to accompany you? Do that now. Learn to enjoy the air once more.
Draft out a plan to achieve those goals. Then take action. You won't see huge results right from the beginning, but so long as you consistently move, you will not be marching stationery for long. That is what you want. Progress. In any part of your life.
With a goal chart in place, it makes it easier for you to channel your energy to those areas you want to see changed or improved, and keeps you on track.
5. Build a support network
Tell a few of your friends about the goals you have set and ask for their support. Friendship at this juncture can work miracles. Family's comfort is a big source of encouragement and relief too. That's why people say "there's no place like home" and I agree totally!
6. Help someone
I'm not kidding. Go your way out to help a friend, or simply make it a point to brighten up someone's day. If you find this idea crazy as it sounds now, and impossible, then all the more you should do it and see how you feel after that.
When you take the focus away from yourself and concentrate on giving to make a positive difference in another person's life, it can be one of the best rewards you can for yourself during a time when you feel you need love and attention yet you are giving it away.
You not only feel better about yourself, you also made another person feel better too. What can be any better than this?
This is by far my favourite among this entire list.
7. Nail down the "Whats" and the "Hows"
What can you do to feel better? How can you achieve that? What is good about yourself? How can you love yourself again?
When you start asking yourself the "What" and "How" you will notice many alternatives mushrooming. Once you have exposed yourself to the gamut of possibilities, you will begin to feel better even before you act on your preferred choice.
The end of a relationship only means you are open to the possibility of another one, which can only be better since you now have more experiences. I hope you had, because if you haven't learn those lessons, you will continue to encounter similar episodes in your life until you finally take those lessons, not only pain, away with you and make yourself richer.
Finally, if you allow your feelings (usually negative ones) to subjugate you, you will always be living in the shadows of your past. Do you really like to stay there forever?
Kloudiia Tay IINg, a Love Coach and Author of the book The 69 Love Notes - Secrets To A Loving And Lasting Relationship" writes about Love and Marriage, Dating Relationships for all singles looking for love and couples wanting to create loving and lasting relationships.
For more articles, please visit http://www.Kloudiia.com now.
Top Relationship Killers - How To Avoid The Pitfalls Of A Failed Relationship
The dating world is often harsh and chaotic. Finding somebody who is worthy of your time can be a difficult and dirty job. Nonetheless, we are compelled to enter such an unforgiving world for the sake of the desired outcome: a good relationship. Once you've found such a gem of a person and settled nicely into a comfortable relationship, you don't want to throw it all away with a nasty mis-step. Below are some common relationship killers and how to avoid them.
Being critical
It is said that a little constructive criticism can be positive. This is the case, of course, for everybody except your girlfriend. Although suggestions are generally considered acceptable, particularly if she asks for them, put downs and unwarranted negative input are expected from her mother, not her lover. If you correct her, tell her how to dress or generally act as though you know best, she will feel self-conscious.
Becoming unkempt
Style is by no means infinitely important, but if you become shabby as soon as you're comfortable with her, she'll be sure to keep her distance. If she was attracted to you when you were wearing starched shirts, chances are that's what she likes, and she may stop being attracted to you if all you wear are t-shirts and dirty jeans.
Being snappy
The more serious you get, the more time you and her spend together. There's a chance that you might find some of her habits to be not as charming as you thought. So, you find yourself nagging her like she's your little sister. You act as though you're annoyed by her every move. You're not, of course, but you just feel comfortable enough to be blunt. Unfortunately for you, she probably won't accept this behaviour for a very long period.
Cheating
Physical cheating is never acceptable unless you and your girl have an agreement about such behaviour, or something like an 'open relationship'. But cheating isn't limited only to sexual misconduct - there is a second type of cheating that can be nearly as hurtful. And that's emotional cheating. This type of cheating applies to very serious relationships in which your girl would expect full disclosure and sharing. It just means that your girlfriend wants to feel like you trust her and confide in her. She doesn't want to be second-best. And if she is, she'll notice.
Being controlling
This one is age-old. Many people in relationships are control freaks. You get jealous of her guy friends. You tell her not to spend so much time gossiping with her girl friends. You tell her she spent too much money at the shoe store. Although women have a reputation for being clingy, they also enjoy their independence. Instead of demanding time, ask for it.
Judging her friends and family
If you find her friends, her sister and her mother annoying, you're going to have an awfully hard time. It's important to try to see what she sees in them. If you try to see the good things in them, you might actually start to like them.
Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and writes articles about love, dating and relationships. He also offers free dating tips for women and free dating advice for men at his website http://www.datersmanual.com
Being critical
It is said that a little constructive criticism can be positive. This is the case, of course, for everybody except your girlfriend. Although suggestions are generally considered acceptable, particularly if she asks for them, put downs and unwarranted negative input are expected from her mother, not her lover. If you correct her, tell her how to dress or generally act as though you know best, she will feel self-conscious.
Becoming unkempt
Style is by no means infinitely important, but if you become shabby as soon as you're comfortable with her, she'll be sure to keep her distance. If she was attracted to you when you were wearing starched shirts, chances are that's what she likes, and she may stop being attracted to you if all you wear are t-shirts and dirty jeans.
Being snappy
The more serious you get, the more time you and her spend together. There's a chance that you might find some of her habits to be not as charming as you thought. So, you find yourself nagging her like she's your little sister. You act as though you're annoyed by her every move. You're not, of course, but you just feel comfortable enough to be blunt. Unfortunately for you, she probably won't accept this behaviour for a very long period.
Cheating
Physical cheating is never acceptable unless you and your girl have an agreement about such behaviour, or something like an 'open relationship'. But cheating isn't limited only to sexual misconduct - there is a second type of cheating that can be nearly as hurtful. And that's emotional cheating. This type of cheating applies to very serious relationships in which your girl would expect full disclosure and sharing. It just means that your girlfriend wants to feel like you trust her and confide in her. She doesn't want to be second-best. And if she is, she'll notice.
Being controlling
This one is age-old. Many people in relationships are control freaks. You get jealous of her guy friends. You tell her not to spend so much time gossiping with her girl friends. You tell her she spent too much money at the shoe store. Although women have a reputation for being clingy, they also enjoy their independence. Instead of demanding time, ask for it.
Judging her friends and family
If you find her friends, her sister and her mother annoying, you're going to have an awfully hard time. It's important to try to see what she sees in them. If you try to see the good things in them, you might actually start to like them.
Michael Douglas is a relationship expert and writes articles about love, dating and relationships. He also offers free dating tips for women and free dating advice for men at his website http://www.datersmanual.com
Female Led Marriage Can Uncork Surprising Feelings In A Marriage
Female led marriage is one of those factors that sits below the radar and continues forever, unnoticed. But may a spotlight could help raise the core of such relationships so that the rest of society could benefit from one of the traits that are usually involved... feelings.
Feelings and emotions are the glue that holds together any relationship. Sometimes that glues just seems to grow stronger as a relationship ages but sadly, more often the story seems to be one of calcifying, crumbling glue that mirrors the quality of the relationship itself. Yet if the partnership is to survive, both the glue and the partnership needs to be resilient and symbiotic, strengthening themselves to strengthen the relationship.
Of course, charity begins at home. Ultimately, each of us is responsible for our own feelings and outlook on life. But even the tiniest life experience will have told you that if someone around you is grumpy, odds are that quite soon you will be too.
Do you feel a reframing coming on? A different way of looking at your life? What are the possibilities if you deliberately attempted to improve the way your ‘better half’ is feeling? What could happen? How could it make you feel? Really? Then what would happen to your relationship? Really?
Often you’ll find that experts in the field of interfering in marital disputes develop an armory... it’s partly to protect themselves, and partly to help the couple to step back and take a fresh look at their situation. Sometimes the contents of that armory are like a good toolkit – lots of tools for use when appropriate. Others structure it more formally – “here’s the ready response to Situation A”. Many of the formal structures include specific steps for the woman to take, and specific steps for the man to take.
Here’s the puzzle. Do a search on your favorite engine and the publicly-available recommendations and suggestions on what each sex should do to make the other feel happy... and discover that they seem to be the polar opposite to traditional roles. Particularly in female led marriage. Some just change the priority, for example ‘tell him/her how sexy s/he is’ rates twice as low on the ‘make her feel good’ scale as it does on the male scale, but others differ dramatically.
This may signal a change in societal mores, or a single strand of tertiary teaching. I don’t know. But one this is for sure... it opens the floodgates for experiment... I hope you enjoy its fruits!
Relationship advice is readily available online at Georgie Maddison's blog http://www.marriagesite.info. Receive daily headlines by email or RSS... subscribe to relationships, marriage, dating, or divorce... or create a fresh category. It's time!
Feelings and emotions are the glue that holds together any relationship. Sometimes that glues just seems to grow stronger as a relationship ages but sadly, more often the story seems to be one of calcifying, crumbling glue that mirrors the quality of the relationship itself. Yet if the partnership is to survive, both the glue and the partnership needs to be resilient and symbiotic, strengthening themselves to strengthen the relationship.
Of course, charity begins at home. Ultimately, each of us is responsible for our own feelings and outlook on life. But even the tiniest life experience will have told you that if someone around you is grumpy, odds are that quite soon you will be too.
Do you feel a reframing coming on? A different way of looking at your life? What are the possibilities if you deliberately attempted to improve the way your ‘better half’ is feeling? What could happen? How could it make you feel? Really? Then what would happen to your relationship? Really?
Often you’ll find that experts in the field of interfering in marital disputes develop an armory... it’s partly to protect themselves, and partly to help the couple to step back and take a fresh look at their situation. Sometimes the contents of that armory are like a good toolkit – lots of tools for use when appropriate. Others structure it more formally – “here’s the ready response to Situation A”. Many of the formal structures include specific steps for the woman to take, and specific steps for the man to take.
Here’s the puzzle. Do a search on your favorite engine and the publicly-available recommendations and suggestions on what each sex should do to make the other feel happy... and discover that they seem to be the polar opposite to traditional roles. Particularly in female led marriage. Some just change the priority, for example ‘tell him/her how sexy s/he is’ rates twice as low on the ‘make her feel good’ scale as it does on the male scale, but others differ dramatically.
This may signal a change in societal mores, or a single strand of tertiary teaching. I don’t know. But one this is for sure... it opens the floodgates for experiment... I hope you enjoy its fruits!
Relationship advice is readily available online at Georgie Maddison's blog http://www.marriagesite.info. Receive daily headlines by email or RSS... subscribe to relationships, marriage, dating, or divorce... or create a fresh category. It's time!
Sunday, March 11, 2007
What Men Really Want
Studies and surveys have led to the top two answers to this question, “Sex and Respect”. Yes, it’s true. Men want plenty of sex and they seek the respect of their partners. This is in contrast to women who primarily desire love and affection.
When it comes right down to it, men get a bad rap. They are often depicted as sex crazed party animals that have no level or desire of commitment, and this simply isn’t the truth. There are many men who seek out a monogamous relationship and are just waiting for the perfect woman to enter the picture. Does this mean that the “perfect” woman is a human Barbie Doll? According to current studies- no. Studies have shown that men are more interested in a woman that is committed to them, respects them, and validates their worth more than a meaningless tryst with a perfect “ten”.
Of course men are attracted to a woman by her physical appearance and that is a main component to the relationship, but as any man in a relationship can tell you, looks wear thin after time and when it comes down to it, personality can make or break a relationship. Men want to be treated with respect and to know that they are appreciated and valued by their partners.
Many women are also surprised to discover that men need love. Often, acts of love, verbal affirmations, and the like are typically reserved for the female and often neglected when it comes to the man. Typically, he is the strong, dominant, tough one in the relationship, so women often neglect to tell or show him how much she loves him. However, many men have stated that this is a strong need that they have. Men need love just as much as women do. They need to hear it, they need to see it demonstrated in actions, and they need to feel it. Now, obviously this is where men’s number one need comes in – sex.
There is no getting around it. The number one way to show a man that his partner loves him is through sex. It is often ironic that women can go without sex much longer than a man, and never realize that he is suffering and feeling unloved. It is a wise woman who realizes that her man equates sex with love and understands that when she withholds sex, she is essentially telling him that she no longer loves, respects, or validates him. It is also easy to understand why men stray when they begin to feel that this area of their relationship is lacking.
It isn’t necessarily that they feel they need a prettier woman, one with a better body, or more money. They are looking for love, because from the man’s point of view, without sex the love is gone. When a woman withholds sex from her partner, she is essentially entering into territory where the future of her entire relationship is being threatened. If you truly love, respect, and validate your partner, communicate honestly with him. Never use sex as a weapon against him. Openly discuss issues as soon as they arise and give your man the respect he deserves, respect him enough to work things out without using sex to punish him. By keeping open communication with your partner, and discussing issues as soon as they arise, you can be sure that you will be giving your man what he really wants.
Ron Zvagelsky has a degree in Business Administration from the University of Southern California. Use PlanJam.com to find additional dating and relationship advice along with date ideas.
0
When it comes right down to it, men get a bad rap. They are often depicted as sex crazed party animals that have no level or desire of commitment, and this simply isn’t the truth. There are many men who seek out a monogamous relationship and are just waiting for the perfect woman to enter the picture. Does this mean that the “perfect” woman is a human Barbie Doll? According to current studies- no. Studies have shown that men are more interested in a woman that is committed to them, respects them, and validates their worth more than a meaningless tryst with a perfect “ten”.
Of course men are attracted to a woman by her physical appearance and that is a main component to the relationship, but as any man in a relationship can tell you, looks wear thin after time and when it comes down to it, personality can make or break a relationship. Men want to be treated with respect and to know that they are appreciated and valued by their partners.
Many women are also surprised to discover that men need love. Often, acts of love, verbal affirmations, and the like are typically reserved for the female and often neglected when it comes to the man. Typically, he is the strong, dominant, tough one in the relationship, so women often neglect to tell or show him how much she loves him. However, many men have stated that this is a strong need that they have. Men need love just as much as women do. They need to hear it, they need to see it demonstrated in actions, and they need to feel it. Now, obviously this is where men’s number one need comes in – sex.
There is no getting around it. The number one way to show a man that his partner loves him is through sex. It is often ironic that women can go without sex much longer than a man, and never realize that he is suffering and feeling unloved. It is a wise woman who realizes that her man equates sex with love and understands that when she withholds sex, she is essentially telling him that she no longer loves, respects, or validates him. It is also easy to understand why men stray when they begin to feel that this area of their relationship is lacking.
It isn’t necessarily that they feel they need a prettier woman, one with a better body, or more money. They are looking for love, because from the man’s point of view, without sex the love is gone. When a woman withholds sex from her partner, she is essentially entering into territory where the future of her entire relationship is being threatened. If you truly love, respect, and validate your partner, communicate honestly with him. Never use sex as a weapon against him. Openly discuss issues as soon as they arise and give your man the respect he deserves, respect him enough to work things out without using sex to punish him. By keeping open communication with your partner, and discussing issues as soon as they arise, you can be sure that you will be giving your man what he really wants.
Ron Zvagelsky has a degree in Business Administration from the University of Southern California. Use PlanJam.com to find additional dating and relationship advice along with date ideas.
0
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Relationship Rescue - 3 Secrets to Rescue Your Relationship
Help! I need to rescue my relationship today!
Here are 3 ideas you can use to save your marriage or love relationship:
1. Make an appointment with a relationship doctor!
Relationship rescue can be complex so consult the relationship doctors, gurus and experts that have studied successful relationships and know what you need to do to get save your relationship. You don't have to go to marriage counselling unless you both have agreed that is the last hope for you. Simply make use of the great books, courses and websites that are out there that teach you how to have a blissful relationship.
2. Remember your vows!
If you are wanting to save your marriage relationship, start by recalling your vows. You made a promise to eachother. Now, it's time to start honoring that promise big time. You may even have to break a sweat to do it! But just re-establish your love relationship as your primary value. Make it all important. And start doing those things that you intuitively know already that make relationships work. The love commitment that you made to each other offers the clues to what you need to do for relationship rescue:
# To love, comfort and keep -- this means be affectionate. Speak to your partner warmly. Encourage, cuddle and caress them. Love works miracles to save your relationship.
# Faithfulness -- keep faith with each other. Support each other. Back one another up. Be the strength that empowers your partner.
# Unconditionality -- you promised to be together through richer or poorer, in sickness and health. If your relationship is sick, you stick with it and do what you need to do to change and make it better.
# Permanence -- your marriage vows may have included "as long as we both shall live" or "until death do us part". That's a promise of eternal love. So eliminate that mental get out clause (breakup or divorce) you are holding in the back of your mind. And take 100% responsibility for rescuing your relationship.
3. The ultimate relationship saver
Invest your energy in your relationship rescue plan by forming a new picture of what you want your love relationship to be like. As you visualise the qualities that you want to see manifest in your marriage or relationship, begin to ask yourself how you personally can start to create this. By taking personal responsibility, you will tap into your enormous creative resources and will be guided as to what to say and do in order to save your relationship.
I think an awesome way to start to rescue your relationship is to make a big effort to show appreciation and gratitude for your partner. This might take an enormous effort on your part if your relationship is really bad, but it can pay immediate dividends in the way you feel and the way the relationship pans out day to day. Simply say thankyou for all the things you are grateful to your partner for. If necessary drag up old memories and say, for example, "Remember that time when you picked up my dry cleaning for me? I really appreciated that. Thank you." Make a game of finding things to be grateful. What you appreciate, appreciates in value.
Gratitude has awesome healing powers. Explore it as part of your relationship rescue mission and you'll find yourself on your way to the truly blissful relationship that you both deserve.
Anne Amore of http://www.super-self.com is thrilled and delighted to offer you this brief relationship advice article. It is her hope that in simply reading Relationship Rescue -- 3 Secrets to Rescue Your Relationship, you'll find the next step to relationship rescue and a lifetime full of love.
May you be now and forever blessed. And so you are.
Copyright 2007 Anne Amore
Here are 3 ideas you can use to save your marriage or love relationship:
1. Make an appointment with a relationship doctor!
Relationship rescue can be complex so consult the relationship doctors, gurus and experts that have studied successful relationships and know what you need to do to get save your relationship. You don't have to go to marriage counselling unless you both have agreed that is the last hope for you. Simply make use of the great books, courses and websites that are out there that teach you how to have a blissful relationship.
2. Remember your vows!
If you are wanting to save your marriage relationship, start by recalling your vows. You made a promise to eachother. Now, it's time to start honoring that promise big time. You may even have to break a sweat to do it! But just re-establish your love relationship as your primary value. Make it all important. And start doing those things that you intuitively know already that make relationships work. The love commitment that you made to each other offers the clues to what you need to do for relationship rescue:
# To love, comfort and keep -- this means be affectionate. Speak to your partner warmly. Encourage, cuddle and caress them. Love works miracles to save your relationship.
# Faithfulness -- keep faith with each other. Support each other. Back one another up. Be the strength that empowers your partner.
# Unconditionality -- you promised to be together through richer or poorer, in sickness and health. If your relationship is sick, you stick with it and do what you need to do to change and make it better.
# Permanence -- your marriage vows may have included "as long as we both shall live" or "until death do us part". That's a promise of eternal love. So eliminate that mental get out clause (breakup or divorce) you are holding in the back of your mind. And take 100% responsibility for rescuing your relationship.
3. The ultimate relationship saver
Invest your energy in your relationship rescue plan by forming a new picture of what you want your love relationship to be like. As you visualise the qualities that you want to see manifest in your marriage or relationship, begin to ask yourself how you personally can start to create this. By taking personal responsibility, you will tap into your enormous creative resources and will be guided as to what to say and do in order to save your relationship.
I think an awesome way to start to rescue your relationship is to make a big effort to show appreciation and gratitude for your partner. This might take an enormous effort on your part if your relationship is really bad, but it can pay immediate dividends in the way you feel and the way the relationship pans out day to day. Simply say thankyou for all the things you are grateful to your partner for. If necessary drag up old memories and say, for example, "Remember that time when you picked up my dry cleaning for me? I really appreciated that. Thank you." Make a game of finding things to be grateful. What you appreciate, appreciates in value.
Gratitude has awesome healing powers. Explore it as part of your relationship rescue mission and you'll find yourself on your way to the truly blissful relationship that you both deserve.
Anne Amore of http://www.super-self.com is thrilled and delighted to offer you this brief relationship advice article. It is her hope that in simply reading Relationship Rescue -- 3 Secrets to Rescue Your Relationship, you'll find the next step to relationship rescue and a lifetime full of love.
May you be now and forever blessed. And so you are.
Copyright 2007 Anne Amore
5 Secrets For Increasing Intimacy – Even In The Busiest Of Relationships
When you fell in love with your partner or spouse you probably felt a strong intimate connection that made your heart hum. But as the years roll by you may be finding that the demands of your careers, children and parenting are leaving you less time for each other and the connection that brought you together in the first place. You’d like to get it back but you may not be sure how to accomplish that goal.
The good news is that increasing the love and intimacy you share with your partner is not as difficult – or even time consuming – as you might think. In just minutes a day you can connect with your partner, experience more passion than perhaps ever before and truly feel as one. All you need to do is make the following practices part of your daily lives.
No. 1: Touch Each Other’s Heart Through Heart-on-Heart Connection. At least once a day perhaps when you awaken, make it a habit to place your hand over your spouse’s heart while they do the same. Concentrate on synchronizing your breathing. This simple gesture will soothe both of you and make you feel calm and connected.
No. 2: Kiss to Awaken Endorphins. Many couples miss out on the pleasures of daily kissing but once you know that kissing releases the feel-good chemicals known as endorphins you’ll want to lock lips more often. Kissing the upper lip is especially effective at endorphin release.
No. 3: Eye-Gaze into Heaven. When was the last time you looked deeply into your lover’s eyes? For best results, gaze into your partner’s left eye, which corresponds to their right brain hemisphere allowing for feeling and experiencing versus thinking and analyzing. As you gaze into each other’s left eye you will feel a deep connection with your partner’s soul.
No. 4: Give Yourself a Jolt. The human body runs on electricity and if we are mindful we can align ourselves with our partner’s energy. To do so, sit facing each other with your chests and bellies touching. Breathe together as you deepen your connection and increase your loving feelings.
No. 5: Create Fun and Laughter. Humor and intimacy go hand in hand. Take time to experience all the funny things that happen to both of you every day but don’t stop there. Consciously build fun and laughter into your lives by dancing and singing together and, if you like, making on-the-spot rhymes up for each other – your own personal version of hip-hop.
We encourage you to incorporate as many of the above practices in your lives as possible and expand upon them as you feel more comfortable. By doing so, you will find you are less stressed, burned out and disconnected. Best of all, you will exchange those negative feelings for those of peace, loving energy and inspiration.
Good luck!
© Elsbeth Meuth, Freddy Zental Weaver – All Rights Reserved
Life partners and beloveds, Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver are the founders and directors of TantraNova Institute in Chicago. They have produced the DVD series “Creating Intimacy & Love” and have been featured on Showtime’s reality show “Sexual Healing,” on NBC’s Starting Over” and many other programs.
To learn more about linking your spiritual and sexual energies and to meet other people who share this interest, visit http://www.TantraNova.com where you can communicate with other members of the TantraNova World Community.
The good news is that increasing the love and intimacy you share with your partner is not as difficult – or even time consuming – as you might think. In just minutes a day you can connect with your partner, experience more passion than perhaps ever before and truly feel as one. All you need to do is make the following practices part of your daily lives.
No. 1: Touch Each Other’s Heart Through Heart-on-Heart Connection. At least once a day perhaps when you awaken, make it a habit to place your hand over your spouse’s heart while they do the same. Concentrate on synchronizing your breathing. This simple gesture will soothe both of you and make you feel calm and connected.
No. 2: Kiss to Awaken Endorphins. Many couples miss out on the pleasures of daily kissing but once you know that kissing releases the feel-good chemicals known as endorphins you’ll want to lock lips more often. Kissing the upper lip is especially effective at endorphin release.
No. 3: Eye-Gaze into Heaven. When was the last time you looked deeply into your lover’s eyes? For best results, gaze into your partner’s left eye, which corresponds to their right brain hemisphere allowing for feeling and experiencing versus thinking and analyzing. As you gaze into each other’s left eye you will feel a deep connection with your partner’s soul.
No. 4: Give Yourself a Jolt. The human body runs on electricity and if we are mindful we can align ourselves with our partner’s energy. To do so, sit facing each other with your chests and bellies touching. Breathe together as you deepen your connection and increase your loving feelings.
No. 5: Create Fun and Laughter. Humor and intimacy go hand in hand. Take time to experience all the funny things that happen to both of you every day but don’t stop there. Consciously build fun and laughter into your lives by dancing and singing together and, if you like, making on-the-spot rhymes up for each other – your own personal version of hip-hop.
We encourage you to incorporate as many of the above practices in your lives as possible and expand upon them as you feel more comfortable. By doing so, you will find you are less stressed, burned out and disconnected. Best of all, you will exchange those negative feelings for those of peace, loving energy and inspiration.
Good luck!
© Elsbeth Meuth, Freddy Zental Weaver – All Rights Reserved
Life partners and beloveds, Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver are the founders and directors of TantraNova Institute in Chicago. They have produced the DVD series “Creating Intimacy & Love” and have been featured on Showtime’s reality show “Sexual Healing,” on NBC’s Starting Over” and many other programs.
To learn more about linking your spiritual and sexual energies and to meet other people who share this interest, visit http://www.TantraNova.com where you can communicate with other members of the TantraNova World Community.
What is the One Secret to Dating Really Hot Women?
Do you want to meet hot women? Are you tired of striking out and going home alone every weekend? If you’re like most of us, it’s hard to meet really hot women in your every day life. Walking up to a hot woman in a bar or the grocery store is often met with the cold shoulder and dirty looks. You may find the singles scene at clubs to be uncomfortable and perhaps your social circle seems to consist of more married friends with a shrinking amount of singles. Perhaps you’re beginning to think there aren’t any pretty girls out there for you. Be realistic - when was the last time you had beautiful women clamoring for your affections?
Visualize for a minute or two what it would be like to have a sexy woman in your life…really picture that pretty girl on your arm, smiling longingly at you. Is she blonde, brunette or redhead? Petite or tall? What’s she wearing? Can you see her clearly in your mind? Believing you can attract hot women is the first step to actually getting a hot woman. After all, if you don’t believe it, why should she?
I’m not asking you to dream the impossible. Having hot women in your life can be a reality. I don’t care what you look like – looks are secondary to most hot women. Think about it. A sexy woman is used to having hot men. It’s not important to her to be seen with eye candy any more. It may have been fun at first, but the novelty wears off fast. Pretty girls want a guy who can keep their interest. Look at the man Christina Aguilera married. Not exactly a hot man, now is he? You see examples like that every where you go. Just look around you – there are average looking guys with hot women.
So take heart - there really are hot women out there that want to meet you! It’s just a matter of being in the right place at the right time. As they say, timing is everything, and that is so true when it comes to dating.
One of my very good friends is a beautiful, successful blonde who looks like Pamela Anderson and she is very actively involved with online dating. It is the only method of dating she ever uses now. She’s gone out with lots of men and had some great relationships. I’ve met a few of them, and they are average looking guys, not sexy, hot men. In fact, there were even a couple geeky ones. She doesn’t really care. She wants substance in a man and she’s not the only hot woman who feels that way. (she’s been dating someone for several weeks now that she really likes, so she may not be on the market for long).
If you want to date beautiful women then quite likely you've also considered matchmaking services to meet some pretty girls. It is not at all surprising that millions of singles have already tried internet dating services as a way to find someone rather than waiting for a chance meeting that never happens. Matchmaking or dating services are very popular and quite safe these days. In fact, it’s probably much safer than an encounter with a stranger in everyday life. Dating sites prescreen their applicants and you are able to see their profiles and pictures before any contact is made. That’s ten times better than going on a blind date too– we’ve all had at least one disastrous blind date!
So whether you’re looking for a relationship with one hot woman, or you want to date many hot women, your best bet is an internet dating service. If you can just believe that it is possible for you to date beautiful women, the pretty girls will flock to you – hot women respond to confidence in a man more than anything – it’s like an aphrodisiac! Take my word for it.
Get more dating secrets in my weekly newsletter, "How to Find and Keep a Hot Woman". Send blank email to datingtips@keep-you-informed.com.
If you are a successful, single man looking for a hot woman worthy of your affections, check out: http://keep-you-informed.com/hotwomen
Visualize for a minute or two what it would be like to have a sexy woman in your life…really picture that pretty girl on your arm, smiling longingly at you. Is she blonde, brunette or redhead? Petite or tall? What’s she wearing? Can you see her clearly in your mind? Believing you can attract hot women is the first step to actually getting a hot woman. After all, if you don’t believe it, why should she?
I’m not asking you to dream the impossible. Having hot women in your life can be a reality. I don’t care what you look like – looks are secondary to most hot women. Think about it. A sexy woman is used to having hot men. It’s not important to her to be seen with eye candy any more. It may have been fun at first, but the novelty wears off fast. Pretty girls want a guy who can keep their interest. Look at the man Christina Aguilera married. Not exactly a hot man, now is he? You see examples like that every where you go. Just look around you – there are average looking guys with hot women.
So take heart - there really are hot women out there that want to meet you! It’s just a matter of being in the right place at the right time. As they say, timing is everything, and that is so true when it comes to dating.
One of my very good friends is a beautiful, successful blonde who looks like Pamela Anderson and she is very actively involved with online dating. It is the only method of dating she ever uses now. She’s gone out with lots of men and had some great relationships. I’ve met a few of them, and they are average looking guys, not sexy, hot men. In fact, there were even a couple geeky ones. She doesn’t really care. She wants substance in a man and she’s not the only hot woman who feels that way. (she’s been dating someone for several weeks now that she really likes, so she may not be on the market for long).
If you want to date beautiful women then quite likely you've also considered matchmaking services to meet some pretty girls. It is not at all surprising that millions of singles have already tried internet dating services as a way to find someone rather than waiting for a chance meeting that never happens. Matchmaking or dating services are very popular and quite safe these days. In fact, it’s probably much safer than an encounter with a stranger in everyday life. Dating sites prescreen their applicants and you are able to see their profiles and pictures before any contact is made. That’s ten times better than going on a blind date too– we’ve all had at least one disastrous blind date!
So whether you’re looking for a relationship with one hot woman, or you want to date many hot women, your best bet is an internet dating service. If you can just believe that it is possible for you to date beautiful women, the pretty girls will flock to you – hot women respond to confidence in a man more than anything – it’s like an aphrodisiac! Take my word for it.
Get more dating secrets in my weekly newsletter, "How to Find and Keep a Hot Woman". Send blank email to datingtips@keep-you-informed.com.
If you are a successful, single man looking for a hot woman worthy of your affections, check out: http://keep-you-informed.com/hotwomen
Friday, March 9, 2007
"I Love Him But I'm Not Turned on to Him"
Erin married Dylan because he was the first man who expressed his love for her and was really nice to her. She was not sexually turned on to him, but she figured that this would come in time. Now, 15 years later, sex is a huge problem in their relationship.
Erin sought me for counseling due to this issue.
“I love Dylan. He is my best friend. I enjoy being with him and doing things with him. But the sex issue is causing too many arguments. I end up feeling guilty because I don’t want to make love with him. Is there something wrong with me?”
“Erin, are you ever attracted to Dylan?”
“There have been a few times when I was really attracted to him and sex was wonderful.”
“What was going on at those times?”
“Those were times when Dylan stopped pulling on me to have sex with him and make him happy and seemed to be happy within himself. Most of the time, he is unhappy because of the sex issue. I just don’t feel attracted to him when he seems so needy.”
“Yes, this is the issue. Women are attracted to a man when he is in his power – feeling good about himself - not when he is coming to you like a needy little boy wanting you to have sex with him to make him feel okay about himself. If he needs sex to feel good, then he is using you and sex addictively, and this will always make you feel used. Most women are not attracted to little boys, and when he is in a needy place, he is like a little boy rather than a strong man.”
“Yes, that is exactly the problem! So there is nothing wrong with me for not being attracted to him when he is needy! What a relief!”
“Is Dylan open to doing his inner work to heal his neediness?”
“I don’t know but I don’t think so. He refuses to go to counseling with me.”
“Erin, the way you can start to heal this issue is to stop feeling guilty and responsible for Dylan and start to take care of yourself by telling your truth. When he is needy and pulling on you for sex, you would need to say to him, ‘I am attracted to you when you feel good about yourself, not when you are needy and wanting me to make you okay by having sex.’”
“But I am afraid of hurting his feelings if I say that.”
“You are taking responsible for his feelings rather than taking loving care of yourself. As long as you believe you are responsible for his feelings instead of yours, you will not be able to heal this. Dylan will not address this issue until you are willing to tell your truth. You are not responsible for how he responds. He can choose to be hurt, or he can choose to be open and curious and learn about what you are talking about and how to begin to move into his power.”
“But what do I do if he is hurt and angry?”
“How do you feel about being with him when he is hurt and angry?”
“I don’t like it.”
“Then say that. Say ‘I don’t like being with you when you are hurt and angry. Let me know when you are open so we can talk about this.’ Then disengage by doing something else – reading a book, going for a walk, calling a friend.”
“Oh, he will be so angry if I don’t stay and talk about his hurt and anger!”
“Erin, notice that you are wanting to control how he feels rather than take responsibility for yourself. This is your end of this codependent system. He is trying to control you into having sex with him and taking responsibility for his feelings, and you are trying to control him by caretaking him. Until you are ready to let go of control over his feelings and take loving care of yourself, nothing will change or heal.”
Erin is working hard to learn to let go of trying to control Dylan’s feelings and take responsibility for herself. In our last session, she told me that she is seeing the light at the end of the tunnel – that she felt herself really attracted to Dylan for the first time in a long time.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" and “Healing Your Aloneness.” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or email her at margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.
Erin sought me for counseling due to this issue.
“I love Dylan. He is my best friend. I enjoy being with him and doing things with him. But the sex issue is causing too many arguments. I end up feeling guilty because I don’t want to make love with him. Is there something wrong with me?”
“Erin, are you ever attracted to Dylan?”
“There have been a few times when I was really attracted to him and sex was wonderful.”
“What was going on at those times?”
“Those were times when Dylan stopped pulling on me to have sex with him and make him happy and seemed to be happy within himself. Most of the time, he is unhappy because of the sex issue. I just don’t feel attracted to him when he seems so needy.”
“Yes, this is the issue. Women are attracted to a man when he is in his power – feeling good about himself - not when he is coming to you like a needy little boy wanting you to have sex with him to make him feel okay about himself. If he needs sex to feel good, then he is using you and sex addictively, and this will always make you feel used. Most women are not attracted to little boys, and when he is in a needy place, he is like a little boy rather than a strong man.”
“Yes, that is exactly the problem! So there is nothing wrong with me for not being attracted to him when he is needy! What a relief!”
“Is Dylan open to doing his inner work to heal his neediness?”
“I don’t know but I don’t think so. He refuses to go to counseling with me.”
“Erin, the way you can start to heal this issue is to stop feeling guilty and responsible for Dylan and start to take care of yourself by telling your truth. When he is needy and pulling on you for sex, you would need to say to him, ‘I am attracted to you when you feel good about yourself, not when you are needy and wanting me to make you okay by having sex.’”
“But I am afraid of hurting his feelings if I say that.”
“You are taking responsible for his feelings rather than taking loving care of yourself. As long as you believe you are responsible for his feelings instead of yours, you will not be able to heal this. Dylan will not address this issue until you are willing to tell your truth. You are not responsible for how he responds. He can choose to be hurt, or he can choose to be open and curious and learn about what you are talking about and how to begin to move into his power.”
“But what do I do if he is hurt and angry?”
“How do you feel about being with him when he is hurt and angry?”
“I don’t like it.”
“Then say that. Say ‘I don’t like being with you when you are hurt and angry. Let me know when you are open so we can talk about this.’ Then disengage by doing something else – reading a book, going for a walk, calling a friend.”
“Oh, he will be so angry if I don’t stay and talk about his hurt and anger!”
“Erin, notice that you are wanting to control how he feels rather than take responsibility for yourself. This is your end of this codependent system. He is trying to control you into having sex with him and taking responsibility for his feelings, and you are trying to control him by caretaking him. Until you are ready to let go of control over his feelings and take loving care of yourself, nothing will change or heal.”
Erin is working hard to learn to let go of trying to control Dylan’s feelings and take responsibility for herself. In our last session, she told me that she is seeing the light at the end of the tunnel – that she felt herself really attracted to Dylan for the first time in a long time.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" and “Healing Your Aloneness.” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or email her at margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.
Thursday, March 8, 2007
The Most Intimate Way to an Extraordinary Relationship
Extraordinary Relationships in 1 Loving Step
Building love in your life, and developing an extraordinary relationship, is something that can transform your life and make it absolutely wonderful. Having an extraordinary relationship with a love partner is something that we can all aspire to. It is not just a dream; it is something that we can actually create.
Your creative power
When you choose to focus on something like that, when you make it a goal to build your relationship and make it really special, to fill your life with love, you harness an enormous reservoir of creative power. That power will go to work for you. It is your intention that activates it. By deciding that you have had enough of a mundane, boring or unfulfilling relationship, and that you want to re-inject the spark and the magic back into it, that sets the magic in motion, as it were. That releases the universe to begin the process of creating that extraordinary relationship.
So to get you going, here is one super-powerful method to begin to make your relationships extraordinary by developing an extraordinarily intimate relationship with love itself.
Return to your heart
All the poems have always said that the heart is where love comes from. Why don't we take that as a kind of gospel truth? We won't question it at all. We will just say, 'Okay, the heart is the place of love.'
The secret doorway to love
In ancient systems of meditation, people actually examined that idea, and they put their attention in the heart space, right in the centre of their chest (actually that's slightly to the right of your physical heart, but it relates to the position of the energy vortex described by Yogis as the heart chakra). And what they discovered shocked them. They experienced what they described as an infinite ocean of love within. This energy vortex seemed to be the access point to feelings of unending, unconditional love. By focusing upon it, a world of love opened up for them. Hey, that sounds pretty good, doesn't it?
Your experiment in Infinite Love
So, put your attention there in your heart space. Start to imagine, picture and feel love, however that manifests for you. Just try and get that feeling there. Bring a sweet smile to your face. Feel good about what you are doing. And breathe and capture that feeling of love. Act your way into the sensation. You just need to get a whisper of it, you just need to feel it for a moment and once you recognise it, it's yours forever.
Let it flow
Think of yourself as a channel or conduit for love. That love flows into you, through you, from you, through this central point in your chest. It's an infinite source, it's never ending. By you focusing on that love, not only will you be able to give it and share it to others because you will be full of love, you'll be constantly expanding love within you, but you'll be giving it to yourself at the same time. Love is rather like the sun -- it shines on all, it doesn't hold back, and that love will be there for you as well. As you feel it and enjoy it, you radiate it.
Being love
By tapping into the very source of love, you will become a being of love. And as you radiate your love into life, just by feeling it, life will re-arrange to reflect that. As within, so without. All your relationships will become extraordinary as a result of you doing this exercise regularly. By bathing in this infinite ocean of love, you will cultivate the power to create an extraordinary relationship with your love partner, with your family, and with the world.
Your extraordinary relationship with love
Accessing infinite love through your body, you are sending a big powerful message to the Universe that your life is all about love. You will find yourself intuitively guided to the right practical ideas and resources to improve your life and make your life experience sweeter and more fulfilling. You will attract people and teachers who can give you the tools and strategies to achieve your personal goals and fulfill your purpose. I personally have found it incredibly valuable to learn from those people who have already achieved what I want to achieve or manifest in my life.
On becoming a love master
In terms of creating beautiful, lasting, loving relationships it's best to learn from those who have mastered the art of relationships. In 50 Secrets to Blissful Relationships, author Michael Webb interviewed long-term couples from the top 1% of happy marriages and got them to reveal their strategies for cultivating extraordinary, love-filled relationships. You deserve to have an extraordinary relationship with a love partner that thrills and delights you, so be sure to check out that resource as it is full of practical tips and suggestions that you probably won't think of on your own. Meanwhile keep developing your extraordinary relationship with LOVE itself, through the heart space exercise you've just learned about.
Anne Amore of http://www.Super-Self.com is delighted to have this opportunity to share The Most Intimate Way to an Extraordinary Relationship with you. May you be now and forever blessed. And so it is.
Copyright 2007 Anne Amore
Building love in your life, and developing an extraordinary relationship, is something that can transform your life and make it absolutely wonderful. Having an extraordinary relationship with a love partner is something that we can all aspire to. It is not just a dream; it is something that we can actually create.
Your creative power
When you choose to focus on something like that, when you make it a goal to build your relationship and make it really special, to fill your life with love, you harness an enormous reservoir of creative power. That power will go to work for you. It is your intention that activates it. By deciding that you have had enough of a mundane, boring or unfulfilling relationship, and that you want to re-inject the spark and the magic back into it, that sets the magic in motion, as it were. That releases the universe to begin the process of creating that extraordinary relationship.
So to get you going, here is one super-powerful method to begin to make your relationships extraordinary by developing an extraordinarily intimate relationship with love itself.
Return to your heart
All the poems have always said that the heart is where love comes from. Why don't we take that as a kind of gospel truth? We won't question it at all. We will just say, 'Okay, the heart is the place of love.'
The secret doorway to love
In ancient systems of meditation, people actually examined that idea, and they put their attention in the heart space, right in the centre of their chest (actually that's slightly to the right of your physical heart, but it relates to the position of the energy vortex described by Yogis as the heart chakra). And what they discovered shocked them. They experienced what they described as an infinite ocean of love within. This energy vortex seemed to be the access point to feelings of unending, unconditional love. By focusing upon it, a world of love opened up for them. Hey, that sounds pretty good, doesn't it?
Your experiment in Infinite Love
So, put your attention there in your heart space. Start to imagine, picture and feel love, however that manifests for you. Just try and get that feeling there. Bring a sweet smile to your face. Feel good about what you are doing. And breathe and capture that feeling of love. Act your way into the sensation. You just need to get a whisper of it, you just need to feel it for a moment and once you recognise it, it's yours forever.
Let it flow
Think of yourself as a channel or conduit for love. That love flows into you, through you, from you, through this central point in your chest. It's an infinite source, it's never ending. By you focusing on that love, not only will you be able to give it and share it to others because you will be full of love, you'll be constantly expanding love within you, but you'll be giving it to yourself at the same time. Love is rather like the sun -- it shines on all, it doesn't hold back, and that love will be there for you as well. As you feel it and enjoy it, you radiate it.
Being love
By tapping into the very source of love, you will become a being of love. And as you radiate your love into life, just by feeling it, life will re-arrange to reflect that. As within, so without. All your relationships will become extraordinary as a result of you doing this exercise regularly. By bathing in this infinite ocean of love, you will cultivate the power to create an extraordinary relationship with your love partner, with your family, and with the world.
Your extraordinary relationship with love
Accessing infinite love through your body, you are sending a big powerful message to the Universe that your life is all about love. You will find yourself intuitively guided to the right practical ideas and resources to improve your life and make your life experience sweeter and more fulfilling. You will attract people and teachers who can give you the tools and strategies to achieve your personal goals and fulfill your purpose. I personally have found it incredibly valuable to learn from those people who have already achieved what I want to achieve or manifest in my life.
On becoming a love master
In terms of creating beautiful, lasting, loving relationships it's best to learn from those who have mastered the art of relationships. In 50 Secrets to Blissful Relationships, author Michael Webb interviewed long-term couples from the top 1% of happy marriages and got them to reveal their strategies for cultivating extraordinary, love-filled relationships. You deserve to have an extraordinary relationship with a love partner that thrills and delights you, so be sure to check out that resource as it is full of practical tips and suggestions that you probably won't think of on your own. Meanwhile keep developing your extraordinary relationship with LOVE itself, through the heart space exercise you've just learned about.
Anne Amore of http://www.Super-Self.com is delighted to have this opportunity to share The Most Intimate Way to an Extraordinary Relationship with you. May you be now and forever blessed. And so it is.
Copyright 2007 Anne Amore
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